This is much better than some message in a bottle. So very subtle, too. A take no prisoner’s approach, which touches my Texan heart.

Watch this little story unfold …

Hand engraved lettering with a hinged book cover. The pages and chain are sterling. All by Digby and Iona.

Puts the world on notice, doesn’t it? You’ll either start a conversation or stop it in its tracks, which ain’t such a bad thing, you know.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.

Katy Kane is one smart cookie. She has found a lavender farm that is the closest thing to Provence this side of the pond. This incredible farm sells all things lavender: candles, soaps, honey, skin care, dried and for cooking. And get this … Carousel Farm was first established in 1748 … that’s some kind of good dirt.

So anyway. Katy gets a mountain of their products for her gift closet: birthday gifts, house gifts, hostess gifts, get well gifts, you name it gifts. You should do what she does, you know. Anyone with such good taste can’t be wrong.

And the best part? You don’t have to speak French. I mean you can, but you don’t have to.

There are 2 sizes of candles. Candle combos like Lavender-Cucumber, Lavender-Rosewood, Lavender-Lavender, here.

Loose lavender, here.

Switch to this honey, now.

They’ve got some kind of wonderful going on at Carousel Farms. Check it out and then write Katy a thank you note.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.

Sassy name for a swanky martini glass.

Each glass comes with a gold plated chain with a hook to impale your olive. The chain is attached to the stem, so you don’t worry about that. So now you don’t have to worry about your olive skittering off the stupid pick and sliding to the bottom of the glass so you have to fish it out with your fingers when you have to have it right this minute. Clearly, I’ve been there. Obv, oh really?

These are in a limited edition, so if you’re planning on lining these up on silver trays for the cocktail party of the century, I’d get thee to these on the hurry side of things. They’re right here.

Yes, I’ll have another, please. Thank you.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.

These bring a whole new meaning to marking your territory. Better than a nametag; each person at your next dinner party gets their initial. The designated driver of dessert plates.

There are so many things you can do with these it makes me dizzy just thinking about it. Load one down with treats for a hostess gift.

Give a set to a bride with her new initial.

Or do S’s for salad and D’s for dessert, just so there’s no confusion. There’s always that possibility, if great quantities of cocktails or wine have been involved, you know.

And speaking of, use the W for a wine coaster. Also a great gift paired with a good bottle … hell, it doesn’t even have to be that good of a bottle if you’re doing this.

Then do a C for Champagne while you’re at it.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.

Winter’s hovering. It’s out there, just waiting for the exact moment you’re not prepared. So fool Mother Nature and get your act together. Winterize your digits now, chick-a-dees.

You best get two pairs of everything … there’s really nothing like just having one glove. Not a good look, you know.

Leather mitts with bling. Kind of biker, kind of not, here.

An homage to Kenny Scharf, for that manic splash of color, here.

By Yohji, of course. Who else?

Little merino mesh mitts; not so practical, but who the hell cares? They’re totally cool, by Rag and Bone, natch.

Cute pandas for those days you really need to channel your inner school girl, here.

So glam you’ll die, and so will everybody else. Not for the faint of heart or pocket, here.

Long, lean arm warmers, which are essential.

Yeah, you can be all crunchy and knit your own, but why? Give those as gifts; get all of these for yourself!

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen

In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month, we all need to rush out and buy this sweater. Or get it to channel your fantasy of wearing pasties. Or to count how many comments you get when you wear it. Is what I’m saying. I would wear Maybelline blue eye shadow to match, just for that tasteful touch.

Your ta-tas, bazooms, rack, tits, headlights … your girls will have a blast.

Winkin’, blinkin’ and nod, right here.

xxooxxo,
Bobbie Pen.

With tongue firmly planted in cheek, this is way better than a fake fur. This has all the style without the tirades and tedious controversy (insert big yawn here). There’s just not a chance that I’ll be caught in some synthetic mess that’s better suited for a carpet. Nope, not gonna happen in this lifetime, or the next for that matter.

No felts were killed, murdered, assassinated, maimed, mutilated or otherwise harmed to keep you one step ahead of the fashion pack.

Thank you, Mister Reinaert.

xxooxxo,
Bobbie Pen

Do you get really sick and tired of rummaging in your enormous bag for stuff you need right this minute? You’ve been there, I know you have. That huge thing that you call your bag is like a black hole and everything goes to the very freaking bottom and you have all of these cases, pouches, holders and whatever the hell else that you were brilliant enough to get to keep everything in its place. Okay, but here’s the prob: all those brilliant little organizers are black and they fade into oblivion and all look the same and then you absolutely lose your mind and have to put your stupid enormous bag on the street, the floor, the whatever and unload the entire damn thing looking like the last fool just to find …. wait for it …. your phone that has since stopped ringing. And then you just want to put a gun in your mouth.

No more.

These are the flash cards of pouches. Loving.

A smart, stylish little collection of everything you could possibly need and all completely affordable so you don’t have to spend another fortune to get organized. … again.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.

This is a ring. I swear. Leave it to Martin Margiela to turn everything on its ear. Just beyond clever and cool. And you know how I feel about that. Think you ought to have this. Like, now.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.

I didn’t write the Great American Novel, but I thought about it.

I didn’t go bird watching; guess they’re still waiting for my call.

I didn’t go to Maine; I had it shipped to me.

I didn’t win Lotto, damn it to hell. Now I’m prepared.

I didn’t get organized, though I considered it briefly. For about 2 seconds.

I didn’t prepare a pig or a pie for the State Fair, so I’m counted out on that
one. Boo.

I didn’t have one date. If you believe that, then I have some pretty amazing
swamp land in Florida you might be interested in.

And there you have it. Very busy summer; I’m exhausted.

xxooxxo,
BobbiePen.